And the Winner Is
by RevSue
Summary: Set during PD2, Clarisse & Joseph fluff .... A challenge response to the eligible bachelor selection scene


_Disclaimer: I don't own any of these characters since Princess Diaries 1 & 2, and its characters are the property of Disney, Buena Vista, and Meg Cabot. I make no money from this work of fiction._

Charlotte had barely settled back in her chair when Joseph had asked why Prince William had been included in the pictures of eligible bachelors for Princess Mia to peruse. The Queen's personal assistant smiled and admitted candidly, "I just love to look at him."

To her delight and Joseph's consternation, Queen Clarisse echoed Charlotte's sentiments. "Me, too!" she sighed dreamily.

The princess and her friend Lilly nodded emphatically. Joseph, rather disconcerted and somewhat disapproving, had said to Queen Clarisse, "Your MAJESTY!" before rapidly moving on to the next candidate.

After Andrew Jacoby, Duke of Kenilworth had been chosen as the bachelor most likely to be a good mate for the new queen of Genovia, Lilly asked Joseph to show the picture of Prince William again. Shaking his head in disbelief, Joseph did as she had requested. The girls both sighed over the handsome prince, but Joseph could faintly comprehend their interest in the young man. What he could not understand in the least was why Charlotte and the Queen ALSO considered the grandson of Britain's Queen Elizabeth to be noteworthy as a ... a sex symbol!

"I could look at his picture all day," sighed Lilly.

"I know," Charlotte nodded. "I have a framed copy of one picture of him in my room."

"Really?" Queen Clarisse turned to her in surprise. "Oh, might I see it sometime?"

"Your MAJESTY!" Joseph protested again.

The Queen laughed at him, and Princess Mia teased, "What's the matter, Joe? Jealous?"

"Of that youngster?" Joseph tried to look disdainful. "Please, your Highness ... Why, I should say there are many bachelors in Genovia alone who are every bit as handsome and charming as HE is!"

"Present company included, I suppose, right, Shaft?" grinned Lilly.

Joseph sniffed scornfully. "I actually was thinking of eligible bachelors right here in the palace. Shades, for example, who gets his share of come-hither looks from the rest of the staff ... right, Charlotte?"

Charlotte blushed. Princess Mia and Lilly cried out in interest, and even the Queen's eyebrows raised in inquiry. "Shades?" Queen Clarisse asked lightly. "Who exactly is Shades?"

"And why are you blushing, Charlotte?" asked Lilly. "Are you one of the ones dreaming about this ... Shades?"

Charlotte mumbled something, bending down to check something at her feet, allowing her hair to hide her red face.

"Shades?" asked Queen Clarisse again.

"Scott," Joseph grinned, glad to have discomfitted Charlotte much as she had surprised him. "He's my second-in-command."

"Ah! Yes ... yes, he IS handsome," the Queen mused.

A little scandalized, Joseph growled a little under his breath as he started packing up the media equipment. That was enough to have Lilly and the Princess start up their teasing again.

"What's the matter, Joe?" repeated Mia. "You know, I really think you're not crazy about us looking at bachelors ... ANY of us!"

Lilly's bright eyes went between the smiling Queen and her Head of Security who was clenching his teeth. She nudged her friend and, with her eyes, indicated the two. Charlotte looked quickly in the same direction, and a curious look crossed her face. "What?" demanded Lilly quickly, turning abruptly to the older woman. "What are you thinking, Charlotte?"

Charlotte jumped. "Oh, oh nothing ..." she stammered.

"It WAS something ..." Lilly began, then she stopped and a big smile crossed her face. "I just had a terrific idea! Why don't we hold a bachelor auction? Then we can ALL see the bachelors this palace has to offer! It can be like a beauty contest ... you know, they have to 'sell themselves' ... and the eligible females can bid on the bachelor's time for a day! Remember when we held one in school, Mia?"

"Yeah," sighed the Princess, "I wasn't noticed when I held up my hand trying to bid on that jerk, Josh."

"Well, your hand would be noticed THIS time!" Lilly guaranteed her. "And THINK of the fun we'd have. Please, your Majesty? Can we have a bachelor auction? There must be some charity we can think of ... if the men are willing to donate their time, we can surely manage the money for a charity. Can we at least THINK about it?"

"I ... I suppose we could," Queen Clarisse sounded doubtful.

Joseph was even more scandalized than before. "You would even CONSIDER such a thing, your Majesty? A BACHELOR auction?"

"Aw, come on, Joe! Think of it as showing yourself off to all the women in the palace ... and you'd be able to show all the young men that even someone YOUR age can be hot!" Princess Mia backed her friend loyally. "If Grandma can and does go gaga over Prince William, with that age difference, think of ... well, think of ME! I'd be willing to pay well for a day in your company! So would Lilly, probably ... and I bet even CHARLOTTE would bid for you!"

"Unless she's saving all her money to put on that Shades guy you were talking about earlier," Lilly added.

Charlotte dropped the clipboard she had been holding and on which she had been making notes. She fumbled for it, and no one noticed in the ensuing commotion that the Queen had narrowed her eyes at her grand-daughter's words, and tightened her lips at the thought of others bidding for Joseph. And yet, if they held such a scandalous event as a bachelor auction, would Queen Clarisse have the nerve to actually bid for Joseph, despite her hidden desires?

"Let's hold it the night of the Independence Day parade," Princess Mia suggested. "That should give us time to find something to put the money towards ... and it's not too far away. Would that work, Charlotte? Does it give you enough time? I know you do most of the organizing around here."

"Your Majesty?" Charlotte looked helplessly at the Queen who hesitated, then shrugged.

"If that is your wish, Mia," she said evenly. "I am not sure I approve, but I will not condemn it."

"And you WILL attend, won't you, your Majesty?" Lilly asked anxiously.

"We shall see," was all the Queen said.

"You'll go in it, won't you, Shaft?" Lilly asked. "And talk this Shades into it, too? For Charlotte?" she added with a wide grin. Then, sighing dramatically as she looked at Charlotte's scarlet face, she said, "Charlotte, you've just GOT to toughen up!"

"I'm not used to being teased," Charlotte mumbled, a little annoyed.

"Tell me something I don't know," Lilly rolled her eyes. "Well, Mia will have to work on that, if she wants to have someone keep her in line once I'm back at Berkeley!"

"I would like to register my protest and extreme disapproval," Joseph said.

"Give it up, Joe," Mia waved his protests away. "It's a done deal, now. It's only a day out of your life!"

"Do I at least get to choose the day?" he queried, scowling.

"Well, you and whoever 'buys' you can work something out." Lilly patted his hand. "If you're lucky, it'll be the Queen herself, and you'll just have to do your usual guard duty!"

Mia and Lilly both giggled at that, although the Queen caught her breath, then masked her emotion so smoothly that the young women never noticed. Queen Clarisse's reaction was, however, noted by both Joseph and Charlotte.

O o O o O o

After the somewhat disastrous garden party and Clarisse's scolding of her grand-daughter who had slammed out of the Queen's suite, Clarisse drew her silk robe more closely about her. Still feeling unsettled, she stood by the window, wishing she could walk out onto the terrace freely. Knowing the guards' reactions to that notion, not to mention Joseph's probable fury, she merely opened the window a crack to let the breeze in. The scent from the rose garden was delicate and lovely. Leaning her head on the window, Clarisse decided the garden was much too romantic with the glitter of moonlight silvering all the rose bushes, the quiet ripple of water in the now-infamous fountain, the scents from the garden. As she stood there, a bird began to sing a lonely night song. It made Clarisse long for something, or to be more specific, for someone. She wanted a touch, a whisper in the dark, an arm around her shoulders. Not just a physical, but an emotional and spiritual partner.

She was old enough and experienced enough to know that many men had desired her over the years, but that wasn't enough for her. She wanted someone who could look beyond her crown, beyond her family background, beyond her body ... and into her heart. Rupert had not been that someone. Was it even remotely possible that ... that Joseph could be the one ... the one who would love her for herself? He had asked her just a few days ago to consider bringing their 'friendship' out of the shadows, to throw off the mantle of secrecy under which they had laboured since their time in San Francisco five years ago. At that time, both had been aware that the easy friendship they had between them could easily become much, much more volatile and passionate should they ever allow it to break free from their control. Their control had kept them close friends, but now Joseph was asking that she consider unleashing her passion ...

A knock came at her door.

"Yes?" she called, not turning from the window as she struggled to put her mask of poise back in place, trying to bury her emotions and thoughts once more.

Her lady's maid, Priscilla, poked her head in. "Your Majesty, Charlotte would like a word with you."

"Very well. Show her in," Clarisse nodded.

"Yes, ma'am."

In moments, a rather nervous Charlotte was standing before Clarisse. "Your Majesty," she began, "It's about the bachelor auction tomorrow..."

Thanks to Charlotte's questions about the plans and organization for the next day, Clarisse was able to successfully put her personal feelings aside once more while doing her duty to her country. When she finally got to bed a short while later, she fell asleep instantly without ever allowing herself to dwell on her own personal needs.

O o O o O o

The next night, Clarisse could hardly keep from holding her hands over her ears at the small shrieks and loud whistles, not to mention the cheers, which greeted each new bid. There were only two bachelors left 'on the market', as Lilly rather crudely put it, grinning over the fact that she had been victorious in outbidding numerous other women for Captain Kip Kelly. Mia had swung around, incredulous, and stared at her friend, who merely raised her eyebrows. The fact that Mia had been successful when bidding on Nicholas, although losing out to Lady Alyssa for Andrew, meant nothing.

Joseph was next. Mia got a determined look in her eye. Clarisse felt like sinking into her chair. How humiliated Joseph must feel ... Then her eyes opened wide when Charlotte jumped up and screamed out, "Take off the shirt!"

Charlotte's cries were echoed around the room, and, laughingly, Joseph slowly unbuttoned his black shirt, and tossed the shirt to Charlotte who pretended to swoon when she caught it. Mia and Lilly were screaming as hard as the other women in the room, and Clarisse had to bite her tongue to prevent herself from actually joining in. Joseph was ... was magnificent! Clarisse's mouth was dry, and her tongue automatically came out to touch her lips as she ran her eyes over the bared chest on the makeshift stage. Joseph preened and posed, obviously not feeling the slightest bit humiliated by the obvious adulation in the room. Shades heckled him from the side, and Joseph shrugged as if to say none of this was HIS fault!

The bidding was fast and furious. Lilly dropped out eventually, but Charlotte, Alyssa and Mia continued. Clarisse was becoming more and more agitated. What did these ... these YOUNGSTERS want with Joseph? He was far too old for ANY of them! At last she stood up and called out a bid far above the last one. Complete silence fell, then the auctioneer bowed.

"Joseph ... sold to her Majesty, Queen Clarisse!"

Two flags of colour burning in her cheeks, Clarisse dropped back down, unable to look at anyone. She paid no attention to the auctioning of the final bachelor, Shades, not knowing nor caring that Charlotte had very quietly outbid everyone else. Clarisse scarcely heard the auctioneer's final comments on the success of the evening, naming the sum of money which had been raised for the new Children's Home in Pyrus, stating that it had been her Majesty's fantastic sum for Joseph which had been the highlight of the evening, making her the winner. When Mia nudged her seemingly shell-shocked grandmother, whispering the repetition of what the man on the stage had said, Clarisse gathered her poise around her as a protective shell, rose gracefully and said very regally that it was thanks to all of the women this evening who had bid and all of the gentlemen who had allowed themselves to be auctioned off for a day that the REAL winners of the evening would be the children themselves.

Then, when everyone was talking and laughing about the evening's events, Clarisse's eyes met Joseph's. For a long moment they stared at each other, not moving, then the connection was broken when a group of women walked between them. Clarisse sank down on her chair again, fighting to keep her poise intact.

"Grandma?" Mia was suddenly at her side. She took Clarisse's rather limp hand and whispered to her grandmother, "I get the feeling that you're, umm, embarrassed, or feeling stupid. You shouldn't, you know. Joe told me when we first met that nobody can make you feel inferior without your consent. This was all in fun, but with a serious purpose – to raise money. And with your help, we raised a LOT of money. Now the Parliament can't laugh at me when I come back to them with the plans for the new Children's Centre. I just want to thank you SO much!"

Clarisse tried to smile, but it was feeble. Mia, however, didn't notice as Lilly spoke to her at that time, and the girls both disappeared.

"Your Majesty?" Joseph was standing before her, bowing, looking his usual urbane self. "I'd like to say thank you for purchasing me ..."

"Your TIME!" Clarisse was quick to correct him.

"Yes, my time for a day ... when do you think that would be possible?"

"I ... I don't ..." Clarisse looked away, then her eyes widened as she saw Charlotte in Scott's arms, their kiss passionate despite the throngs of people. "Oh, my ..." she said faintly. Then she looked at Joseph again. "I thought ... I thought she ... and you ..."

Joseph shook his head, smiling indulgently. "Oh, no, Clarisse. Charlotte is as dear to me as a daughter ... and looks upon me as her mentor. Personally, I think she used me to make Shades a little jealous – and it appears her ploy worked. Might I hope that I have assumed correctly that we made someone else a tiny bit jealous as well?"

Clarisse quivered, indecision racing across her face followed by regret, then dismay. Oh my, she thought faintly, Is that how my bid came across? JEALOUSY? Surely not! And yet ... and yet ... I WAS unreasonably annoyed by the actions of the young women ... Then her mask slipped into place again. "We'll have to negotiate a day sometime, Joseph, but don't expect it for a few weeks. As you are well aware, I am quite busy with Mia's wedding. I'm afraid you'll just have to wait."

Joseph nodded, masking his disappointment as well. He would continue to wait for her. He had no choice.

O o O o O o

Clarisse had never felt so loved, so cherished, so thoroughly sated in her entire life. As her heartbeat and her breathing gradually returned to normal, her mind began to function again as well. Nothing in her previous life had prepared her for the wonder and passion she had just experienced. Had she realized what she had been missing all those years with Rupert, she never would have been as content as she had been, so it was perhaps just as well she had been ignorant of the feelings that now flooded her. And because Joseph had kept murmuring her name while making such exquisite love with her, telling her how he loved her compassion, her sense of duty, her beauty, her sweetness, her strength, in fact everything that made Clarisse who she was, she knew he hadn't just made love with Queen Clarisse of Genovia. No, he had made love with Clarisse, the woman.

Her hands were still spread over Joseph's smooth skin, and she kissed the bare shoulder so close to her lips. "I read something once I've never forgotten ... about love. 'The most important thing in life is to learn how to give out love, and to let it come in.' I'm finally learning how to love openly ... and to accept love. But I still need your help, Joseph. I love you," she whispered. "I've never dared say it before today, but I love you ..."

He adjusted their positions so that she was in his arms, facing him. "I knew it could be like this between us ... that is, I dreamt and hoped and prayed it would be like this ..." Joseph began to caress her, kindling deeper responses in her soul. "Especially after you bought me at the bachelor auction."

"Joseph ..." her voice was a mere whisper. "I can't believe I actually ... I did, didn't I? I BOUGHT you!" Then she chuckled richly. "I must say, I do believe it was a very good investment!"

"Hmmm ... for a one day contract, wasn't it?"

Before losing herself in his arms once more, she murmured, "We changed that contract today before the Archbishop ... and the world. Remember?"

"I never want to forget it, my love. And you'll never have to worry about me being up for auction at a bachelor auction again. I'm planning to be a happily-married man deeply in love with his wife for the rest of my life." His hands continued to stroke her, growing more daring and more insistent.

"I am very glad to hear that. I DO like being the winner, but after paying such an exorbitant amount for you this time, I should think I will own you for the rest of our lives!" Clarisse finally lost her train of thought as she began to eagerly respond to his touch. "Oooh, YES, Joseph, keep doing that!"

"Your wish is my command, my queen! MY queen ... queen of my heart ... because yes, you WILL own me forever, and we are BOTH winners in love!"


End file.
